Thursday, October 3, 2013

Last night, I got a visitor's pass so I could go to Maik's to play Magic. Sam brought Chinese food and it was good. We all opened 8 booster packs from the new Theros expansion and played a sealed deck tournament. I lost against Maik, but won against Sam. I used a mono green deck.

Today, I worked from 10:30 to 5:30, with a 2 hour break, for a total of 5 hours. Amadeo and I finished the tile in the bathroom and kitchen. Amadeo was proud, because we finally finished, and because it was the one task he was afraid of not doing right due to his inexperience with it.

Amadeo took us to McDonald's for lunch, and then took me to LSU Behavioral Health to get my psychological assessment results. As it turns out, I have Asperger's syndrome, depression, and have the official diagnosis to prove it now. I am so happy because this will help me alot in the future with therapy and getting disability income. I am just glad I have the diagnosis because I understand myself better now and how to better cope with my problems and struggles.

While I was at LSU, Amadeo went to Home Depot, and came to pick me up after. We returned to the house, and we finished laying the tile. Hooray!

I chatted with Dyanis tonight and stayed focused on it, so it went well. She was happy for the second day on a row. I am about to go to bed.

We finished the tile, yay! :)

Sunday, June 23, 2013

COH: $180.00

EBT: $124.51

Phone: 212.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $8.00

Weather: 94°F sunny

Mood: ok, restless

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, Dawn made breakfast: banana pancakes and bacon. It was delicious. Afterwards, I washed the dishes, took care of the cat, and brought my birds outside to clean their cages. I walked around for a bit before coming to CC's to post this blog. Later at 5:00, I have an appointment with an Asperger's specialist. I am anxious and can't wait. This Abilify is killing me with restlessness, and I hardly have the patience to stay still long enough to do anything, but I keep taking it anyway. I was told by both therapists Anya and Courtney to exercise off the extra energy. I hate working out, but I love walking and riding my bike. I walked to City Park and back yesterday, and did some walking and riding today. It helps a little bit to burn off the energy even though my restlessness is always present. Until tomorrow...

                                   

Saturday, June 22, 2013

COH: $120.00

EBT: $124.51

Phone: 213.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $8.00

Weather: 86°F sunny

Mood: ok, restless, stressed

Weight: 283 lbs.

I went into work today and sanded part of a door. I was going to sweep up a bunch of rooms, but I could not take it anymore. I was by myself, overwhelmed, and could not bring myself to do any more work. Not wanting to let Mills down and not waste his time, and realizing that I was basically useless today as far as lacking motivation and energy to do the work, I left and told him I quit. 

I later talked to him and told him what happened. He is fine with it and even will let me back if I want to come back. I don't know what is going on with me. I don't feel right in my mind, and it is just weird. I have no patience to do hardly anything anymore, yet I feel like I have to be constantly moving. I think it is the Abilify making me fel this way. It sucks, but I don't want to dive into depression again like the last time I stopped taking it.

Amadeo was not happy, and he felt that without a job, I would fall of track and have a reverse sleep schedule again (up all night, sleep all day). I would like to think that with my new proposed schedule via the contract, I have something to hold onto to keep me on track. I understand his worries, though. I will do my best not to fall of track. Who knows? I might get another job or go back with Mills, but right now, I can't handle the job anymore. 

Not knowing what else to do, I tried calling Sasha to see if she could use a cleaning helper, but she didn't answer. I also called and scheduled an appointment with an Asperger's specialist: Courtney Olds. She was the only one of several that answered my call and called me back. I go tomorrow at 5:00pm and it will cost me $40. I hope it goes well and helps me. I am willing to pay for 3 sessions out of pocket like this, because that's how many the lady said I would need to really get help with my condition. I may even see her in the future if I make more money. Anya is a great therapist, but I feel like I need the specialist for my Asperger's. I told her about the Abilify and she suggested that I get more exercise. I suppose I could walk and ride my bike more to burn off the energy during the day.

The rest of the afternoon, I took the birds outside and washed the dishes. Then, I helped Dawn sweep and mop the floor, and then she started cooking. She went to get a burger at Rally's to hold her over while I watched the cooking pot for her. When they got back, I came here to post the blog and get directions to my appointment tomorrow, The rest of the night, I will bring my birds in and get ready for bed so I can stay on track.