Wednesday, July 3, 2013

COH: $152.00

EBT: $43.88

Phone: 217.40

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $1.50

Weather: 82°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Amadeo got pissed at me for sleeping during the day yesterday. I was honestly very tired. I had cleaned the refrigerator and took a shower, which took energy out of me. He probably thinks this is the "first straw" to "junkie behavior", but little does he know this does not affect my schedule. I will still be home for 10:00 and in bed for 11:00. I do not stay out late anymore. In fact, I go to a different cafe to make sure I get home on time. Here we go again with him being mad at me. 

At the same time, I do need something to do during the day, though. Maybe I should go back to work with Mills. If I do, though, I can't post blogs on Wednesdays because I can't carry my cards and my laptop at the same time. There simply is not enough room and it is too much to carry. And if I don't go to Wednesday night Magic, well there goes my social life. I don't know what to do. My life is so fucking hard and complicated, even with the littlest things. I really fucking hate having Asperger's Syndrome. There are days that I would rather having just about anything else disabling me, but alas, I can't change it. I guess I will just have to suffer for the rest of my miserable life. :/

Today from noon to 3:00, I went to a NAMI picnic in City Park. The food was good and I got to meet some new people. Now I am posting this blog at CC's. Later, I will go to Maik's to play Magic. 

I hate how I feel on this medicine. I am restless, anxious, fidgety, and can't calm down for a second. It's like I have Parkinson's Disease. I wish I could just eliminate the side effect or better yet stop taking it altogether and take something else for my depression.