Sunday, June 30, 2013

COH: $180.00

EBT: $88.03

Phone: 21.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $1.50

Weather: 91°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Today, I took care of the cats and took the birds outside. I called Lou, but no answer. I have been pretty good about staying on track with sleep, showering, eating, and calling Amadeo, as well as posting this blog. I was getting bored at home, so I came here. 

Saturday, June 29, 2013

COH: $180.00

EBT: $88.03

Phone: 31.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $1.50

Weather: 91°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Today I did not do too much except go to the store to get a can opener. I cleaned Sam's apartment and chat with Dyanis. Lou wants to hang out tomorrow, so at least I will get some social interaction.

Friday, June 28, 2013

COH: $120.00

EBT: $88.03

Phone: 62.80

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $1.50

Weather: 91°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

I didn't do too much today other than laundry and taking care of the kitten. I also took my birds outside and went to Dollar General for some laundry detergent. My jaw joint hurts because of TMJ/the earplug problem. Also, my left elbow hurts from riding my bike for whatever reason. I think it's because of the posture of my arms while on the bike. Today was pretty boring. I will go home later, bring my birds in, shower, and get ready for bed. No picture today because I forgot my webcam. 

Thursday, June 27, 2013

COH: $134.00

EBT: $88.03

Phone: 101.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $12.00

Weather: 92°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Sam dropped me off this morning. I stayed the night after playing Magic at his place with Andrew. When I got home, Dawn and Amadeo were leaving. Dawn gave me instructions on how to take care of the kitten and then they left. I got a few more hours of sleep, then I got up and started my day. At 3:00, I had my therapy appointment with Courtney. I actually made it there 20 minutes early, got started early, and go to stay until 4:00. It went very well. On the way home, I saw Ben and we talked for a bit. We exchanged numbers and he tried to convince me to come back to work with Justin. Honestly, I will have to think about it first, but maybe. Maybe I need a longer vacation from it first. 

Anyway, here I am at CC's posting the blog. I will work on keeping on track/schedule and call Amadeo before bed at 10:00pm. I will also work on keeping a daily schedule in general as that is what we worked on in therapy. I seriously do not want to fall off track. After this, I will go home and eventually go to bed. 

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

COH: $134.00

EBT: $88.03

Phone: 119.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $12.00

Weather: 92°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I got up and took out my birds. Unfortunately, I noticed one of my females has a lump in her bottom and I'm worried that she might be egg bound. This is a serious condition that could kill her and I don't know what to do. I am hoping Amadeo could take me to Bird's Unlimited today to see if Ms. Joann can do anything about it, and maybe even buy the two chicks I have while I'm at it. Later tonight, Sam is going to pick me up and we will play Magic at his apartment with Andrew. He will get food and I will spend the night, so Sam won't have to drive me back so late. I hope everything goes well.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

COH: $190.00

EBT: $95.00

Phone: 136.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $12.00

Weather: 86°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today was ok. It rained earlier, which was depressing, so I slept in. I rode to the Coca-Cola building (NAMI) to meet with Caitlin my social worker. I mostly filled out my Tivoli Place application, talked with her, and she reviewed my application. Everything went well. I then rode to Radio Shack to return my decibel reader because it stopped working. There were no more in the store, so I got my money back and was told to call back on Thursday at 7:00 to see if they received any more in their shipment. 

I came home and Amadeo and Dawn were there with the new kitten. I hung around for a while and ate chicken noodle soup before heading out again to Rouse's and Dollar General for some grocery shopping. Amadeo and Dawn left to go somewhere, too. After that, I came home, unloaded my groceries, then headed out here to CC's to post my blog, since I had not gotten a chance to post it yet. After this, I will go home, shower, and go to bed. 

Monday, June 24, 2013

COH: $142.00

EBT: $120.26

Phone: 185.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $12.00

Weather: 93°F sunny

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I went to therapy. It went well, but I found out I can't see two therapists at the same time, so Anya held my next appointment until a month from now. In the meantime, I will see Courtney Olds for 3 more sessions and go from there. I think I will stick with Anya after that unless Courtney is a much better help for me. Not much going on today. I might go grocery shopping later, and also ride my bike. Tomorrow, I meet with Caitlin in her office since she can't come to me.

Sunday, June 23, 2013

COH: $180.00

EBT: $124.51

Phone: 212.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $8.00

Weather: 94°F sunny

Mood: ok, restless

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, Dawn made breakfast: banana pancakes and bacon. It was delicious. Afterwards, I washed the dishes, took care of the cat, and brought my birds outside to clean their cages. I walked around for a bit before coming to CC's to post this blog. Later at 5:00, I have an appointment with an Asperger's specialist. I am anxious and can't wait. This Abilify is killing me with restlessness, and I hardly have the patience to stay still long enough to do anything, but I keep taking it anyway. I was told by both therapists Anya and Courtney to exercise off the extra energy. I hate working out, but I love walking and riding my bike. I walked to City Park and back yesterday, and did some walking and riding today. It helps a little bit to burn off the energy even though my restlessness is always present. Until tomorrow...

                                   

Saturday, June 22, 2013

COH: $120.00

EBT: $124.51

Phone: 213.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $8.00

Weather: 86°F sunny

Mood: ok, restless, stressed

Weight: 283 lbs.

I went into work today and sanded part of a door. I was going to sweep up a bunch of rooms, but I could not take it anymore. I was by myself, overwhelmed, and could not bring myself to do any more work. Not wanting to let Mills down and not waste his time, and realizing that I was basically useless today as far as lacking motivation and energy to do the work, I left and told him I quit. 

I later talked to him and told him what happened. He is fine with it and even will let me back if I want to come back. I don't know what is going on with me. I don't feel right in my mind, and it is just weird. I have no patience to do hardly anything anymore, yet I feel like I have to be constantly moving. I think it is the Abilify making me fel this way. It sucks, but I don't want to dive into depression again like the last time I stopped taking it.

Amadeo was not happy, and he felt that without a job, I would fall of track and have a reverse sleep schedule again (up all night, sleep all day). I would like to think that with my new proposed schedule via the contract, I have something to hold onto to keep me on track. I understand his worries, though. I will do my best not to fall of track. Who knows? I might get another job or go back with Mills, but right now, I can't handle the job anymore. 

Not knowing what else to do, I tried calling Sasha to see if she could use a cleaning helper, but she didn't answer. I also called and scheduled an appointment with an Asperger's specialist: Courtney Olds. She was the only one of several that answered my call and called me back. I go tomorrow at 5:00pm and it will cost me $40. I hope it goes well and helps me. I am willing to pay for 3 sessions out of pocket like this, because that's how many the lady said I would need to really get help with my condition. I may even see her in the future if I make more money. Anya is a great therapist, but I feel like I need the specialist for my Asperger's. I told her about the Abilify and she suggested that I get more exercise. I suppose I could walk and ride my bike more to burn off the energy during the day.

The rest of the afternoon, I took the birds outside and washed the dishes. Then, I helped Dawn sweep and mop the floor, and then she started cooking. She went to get a burger at Rally's to hold her over while I watched the cooking pot for her. When they got back, I came here to post the blog and get directions to my appointment tomorrow, The rest of the night, I will bring my birds in and get ready for bed so I can stay on track. 

                                      

Friday, June 21, 2013

COH: $93.00

EBT: $124.51

Phone: 261.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $10.00

Weather: 89°F sunny

Mood: ok, restless, stressed

Weight: 283 lbs.

Justin told me he didn't need me today, so I didn't go into work. Tomorrow, I will, however. I took my birds outside and did my morning routine, then I organized Amadeo's receipts. Later, I went to pick up my meds. It took a while, but I finally got them. From there, I went home, went to Dollar General for some things, and went back home. Dawn was there and they let me have some pizza. I started washing clothes and finished Amadeo's receipts. After that, I headed here to CC's to post my blog. Later, I will finish the clothes, cook spaghetti, bring the birds in, and get ready for bed. I hope tomorrow I can make it into work ok. 

Thursday, June 20, 2013

COH: $121.00

EBT: $137.01

Phone: 75.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $2.00

Weather: 83°F cloudy, rainy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

I missed work again today, because I overslept. I was weak, tired, and could not pull myself out of bed. I don't know what's wrong other than maybe depressive symptoms. Anyway, I got up at 2:30pm and started my routine. I took the birds outside when Amadeo came home. He asked why I wasn't at work and we talked about it. He was disappointed, but wanted to know what set me off track and wanted me to do better tomorrow. I think I have too much on my plate.I might have to stop going to MTG on Wednesday nights and play on the weekend instead. I have more time then, and I won't have to worry about messing up my weekday schedule. I know Anya or others would say it is a bad idea because it is my only regular social outing, but I think it is for the best. I didn't even get home late last night, either. I stopped playing at about 9:00p and left at about 9:15. I was home for 9:40 and in bed for 10:00. Anyway, my work schedule is too much for me to squeeze in MTG. I don't even like going anymore. I am still willing to play on weekends, but by now the Wednesday night thing is too much for me to handle.  

I am chatting with Dyanis now while posting my blog, verifying my Safelink account, and looking for jobs on Craigslist.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

COH: $167.00

EBT: $137.01

Phone: 96.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $2.00

Weather: 86°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: sick, tired, weak

Weight: 283 lbs.

Last night, I crashed at about 8:30. I was so exhausted. I slept more or less nonstop until 11:00am today, with a few short wake-ups in between. I called in sick to work today because I feel sick, tired, and weak. Then, I rested until about 12:30pm. I could not handle doing hard work like demolishing the bathroom wall today, which is what I'm sure I would be doing. Anyway, Amadeo came back and helped me get up and moving, as well as handle some business with getting my bike back. I still feel sick, tired, weak, and sore from yesterday, but I managed to get here to post this blog because I have to and it was within my means to get here. I took my birds outside today. I will go later to Maik's to play Magic and hang out. Then, I will go home and go to bed. I hope I feel better soon.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

COH: $195.00

EBT: $138.01

Phone: 115.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $2.00

Weather: 88°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: frustrated, stressed out, in pain

Weight: 283 lbs.

I have been having bad luck lately :( Yesterday, on the way home from getting my new decibel reader that stopped working, I had a bike accident. When I was coming off Jeff Davis Pkwy, I was going fast from the momentum and lost control of my bike. I fell of and crashed, leaving me with road rash. I took my bike to the shop and at first it just need a front wheel true, but later I was told the fork was bent. Amadeo helped clean up my wounds, which I am thankful for, then I took a shower and went to bed. 

I woke up this morning tired and sore from yesterday. I took the bus in to work today. It started off ok, but later I got burnt out about halfway through the shift and started being in pain/sore from the accident. I could barely get myself to do anything. It sucked and Mills noticed, but told me not to apologize when I tried to. Anyway, I took the bus home and laid down for a while. Amadeo got out the shower and we talked for a bit. I ate my lunch from today because Justin bought me lunch today :) Then, I changed, packed up my computer, and headed to the bus stop. I am at CC's now posting my blog.

Later, I will do the usual and prepare for the next day by making my lunch, taking a shower, and going to bed. I hope tomorrow goes better than today, because today sucked! I am tired, stressed, and in pain. It is so frustrating. It feels like I just keep getting worse and not better, but I will not give up. :|

Monday, June 17, 2013

COH: $253.00

EBT: $138.01

Phone: 145.40

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $0.00

Weather: 88°F sunny and partly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I had therapy. It went well. I took my birds outside as usual on my off days. I am in uptown CC's posting this blog. Afterward, I am going to buy a new decibel reader from Radio Shack because my current one stopped working properly. I have to have my decibel reader! :-$ Anyway, the rest of the day, I will find something to do and prepare for tomorrow. I hope I get to work with Terry again.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

COH: $252.00

EBT: $145.16

Phone: 145.40

Visa: $1.97

Laundry: $0.00

Weather: 84°F mostly cloudy

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I am off, since it is Sunday. I went to Irene's going away party last night. It went very well and I got to meet new people. :) Before I got there, thought, I went to McDonald's and my iPod got stolen! I accidentally left it on the table when I went to get my food and when I returned, it was gone! :-O This sucks, but I will live. It just goes to show you that people will steal and you can't take your eyes off of your valuables for even a second when in a public place. 

I am at The Bean Gallery posting this from my laptop with the new webcam Amadeo got me for my birthday :) Until I get another mobile device, I will have to post from my laptop from now on. Instead though, I will post at CC's because it is closer, I don't have to go inside to pay for a drink to use the internet, and they close at 9:00, so I won't be there later than 10:00pm, when I should be home. In a way, this is a blessing in disguise, since I prefer to use a laptop or computer for internet. At the same time, I don't have as much portability as I did with the iPod and the camera that is on it. The tags are easier to use on the laptop, but the location is not. Also, I will have to either bring my laptop to Maik and Sam's places, or ask them to use the computer. Most likely the latter, though, since they don't like me using their computers, at least Maik.

Anyway, I took my parakeets outside today, cleaned their cages, and changed their food and water. They are so happy outside! :) I have not got to do this in over a week. It rained a little today, but very lightly and it was a sun shower. I went to Dollar General for a few things, and talked to Dyanis on the phone before heading out with my laptop to eat and post my blog.

Saturday, June 15, 2013

COH: $268.76

EBT: $148.91

Phone: 163.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 90•F sunny

Mood: good! :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today at work, I helped the electrician Terry run wires through the house. He comes off as an asshole, but really isn't, and explains things well. He and Justin were very proud of my hard work and thanked me many times throughout the day. I feel accomplished and Terry offered to have me help him long tern and maybe even get an apprenticeship. Who knows what the future will hold? Tonight, I am going to Irene's going away party. 

Friday, June 14, 2013

COH: $268.76

EBT: $148.91

Phone: 217.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 93•F sunny

Mood: pretty good 

Weight: 283 lbs.

At work today, we put up doors and frames. It was just me and Mills, with a little help from Brian, so it took all day. Not to mention it is tedious and time consuming. Mills was getting frustrated with it.

Anyway, today is pay day $130. I am trying to save it as much as possible and later I will eat, wash clothes, and prepare for another day of work tomorrow.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

COH: $170.00

EBT: $166.99

Phone: 218.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 91•F sunny

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I worked. I I'd a variety of things, but notably, we put up walls and studs.

Lately I have been feeling lack of energy and motivation. My mood is low too, but I am still getting by. I wonder what's wrong, or what's going on.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

COH: $170.00

EBT: $166.99

Phone: 219.40

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 90•F sunny

Mood: good :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I took the bus to work because my bike was in the shop. I did alot of different things, but mostly wood putting the windows and various cleanup duties. Amadeo picked up my bike while I was at work since it was finished being fixed. Now, I am at Maik's. I had Reginelli's pizza and will chat with Dyanis before playing cards.

Tuesday, June 11, 2012

COH: $221.98

EBT: $166.99

Phone:223.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $3.00

Weather: 91•F sunny, partly cloudy

Mood: good :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I went with Caitlin to apply for SSI. It went well. Later, I took my bike to the shop. I will get it back tomorrow or Thursday. There is a lot to fix on it, but it is just normal wear and tear the guy said. Now I am at CC's posting this blog.

Monday, June 10, 2013

COH: $230.00

EBT: $177.99

Phone:235.00

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $3.00

Weather: 81•F cloudy and rainy

Mood: good :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Power went out this morning. It's still out.  Therapy went well today. I am about to see the psychiatrist and maybe later hang out in uptown while I am in the area.

Sunday, June 9, 2013

COH: $230.00

EBT: $177.99

Phone:263.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $0.00

Weather: 81•F cloudy and rainy

Mood: good :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today, I got up, ate breakfast, showered, then played Mtg with Sam. I got to Chat with Dyanis last night and this morning, which went well. We later went to Quiznos and then home. I unpacked, tidied up a little bit, and now I walked to post this blog. Not much going on today. Maybe Lou will come over to play mtg or something. Today will be a relaxed day, as Sundays should be.

Saturday, June 8, 2013

COH: $260.00

EBT: $177.99

Phone:267.80

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $10.00

Weather: 81•F 

Mood: great! :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

At work today, we removed a bathtub, swept, moved lumber, broke up concrete, and dug up pipes. All of these tasks were very hard, but we eventually got them done. I feel accomplished and today is a great day! :D

Later, Sam picked me up and we ate Quiznos. I cleaned Sam's apartment and he was very happy with how I did. We used 3 different cleaners on the toilet. It didn't get all the stains, but it was better than before. I faced my fear of using the toilet gel and I feel accomplished for that too! I know Amadeo would be proud. It wasn't that bad and did not require gloves because it was not corrosive. I also helped him organize his outdoor closet. He was relieved because he is going to have to move the stuff in it soon due to apartment renovations.

I am staying the night and we are going to play Mtg in a few minutes.

Friday, June 7, 2013

COH: $260.00

EBT: $177.99

Phone:101.40

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $0.00

Weather: 86•F sunny

Mood: great! :)

Weight: 283 lbs.

Today at work, we demolished fir downs, picked up wood and sorted it, removed nails from boards, sanded doors, and swept. I got paid $100 today, 10 of which is a bonus from Mills because he appreciates my hard work :)

I now have $250 saved up, so now I can see Dyanis this summer. It is a lot of money, but it is worth it since she means so much to me. I miss her so much and can't wait to see her again.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

COH: $188.45

EBT: $177.99

Phone: 135.80

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $0.00

Weather: 88•F sunny

Mood: ok

Weight: 283 lbs.

I meet with my social worker at about 3:30 today. So far, I washed a load of clothes, took my birds outside, went to Dollar General, and walked to CC's to post my blog.

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

COH: $188.45

EBT: $0.00

Phone: 161.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 88•F sunny and rainy

Mood: good

Weight: 277lbs.

At work today, we put up a door, dug up pipes, and swept. I git really dirty from digging, but I got to two pipes. I feel accomplished. Mtg was cancelled tonight because Sam had to go to Kyle's house warming party.  

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

COH: $188.45

EBT: $0.00

Phone: 174.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $5.00

Weather: 88•F sunny

Mood: pretty good :)

Weight: 277lbs.

At work today, we put up windows, put up siding, picked up trash, broke up concrete, and dug holes. Then, I helped Ben load his fish tank in Mills' truck. I got paid $140 today. Now I am posting this blog. Another day in the grind. I will get ready for bed later and work tomorrow.

Monday, June 3, 2013

COH: $64.54

EBT: $14.74

Phone: 182.60

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $10.00

Weather: 88•F sunny

Mood: good B-)

Weight: 281 lbs.

Today, I went to therapy. It went well and we dug deep into my issues. It was a milestone session for sure. After that, I went grocery shopping. I will chat with Dyanis later at 5. 

Sunday, June 2, 2013

COH: $100.68

EBT: $14.74

Phone: 273.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $10.00

Weather: 84•F sunny

Mood: great! :)

Weight: 275 lbs.

Last night, we played Magic after the pool party, then I went home. Today, I slept in a little, but still stayed on track. Amadeo is at Sasha's right now. It rained earlier, so I stayed inside, worked on magic decks, and looked through and organized my cards. Now, it is sunny, so I went to McDonald's to post my blog. When I get back, I will take my birds outside.

Saturday, June 1, 2013

YCOH: $140.61

EBT: $51.72

Phone: 273.20

Visa: $0.93

Laundry: $10.00

Weather: 88•F sunny and cloudy

Mood: good

Weight: 275 lbs.

Today, I have the day off. Dawn got us breakfast, I took my birds outside, and washed clothes. Later, I went to Sam's for a pool party / barbecue with Maik and Michelle. Iit is for my birthday. I don't have a swimsuit that fits me. I can go buy one at Old Navy if possible, but either way I will have fun. :)

R